Intimacy is an interesting thing. I think there are a lot of people who don't truly understand it's meaning or it's purpose. In the beginning of a relationship, we tend to think of physical advances as a way to communicate that we're interested in making the relationship more serious. Personally, I'd tend to argue that it should be the other way around. Assuming your relationship is being built upon some foundation of friendship, trust, and care... and not intended to be purely physical... I think that the physical side of a relationship should really be more like... a symptom. Physical intimacy is like sneezing or coughing when you have a cold. It's a natural side effect that starts happening. You don't force yourself to do it.
This isn't to say of course that just because your body is telling you to go somewhere, that you should, "because it's a natural side effect." That's not what I'm saying. Obviously I believe in restraining those impulses until the time when it is appropriate, such as, within the bounds of matrimony (depending on what level of intimacy you're referring to).
However, I think this is an important distinction. It means that being physical with someone will not create a good foundation for your emotional and spiritual relationship with that person. Sure, it may create a false sense of trust and security for a time, but the foundation will not be there. Your relationship will eventually collapse if you were attempting to build the emotional and spiritual facets of your relationship on top of your physical relationship. Rather, if you build your emotional and physical relationship with this person, they will slowly become your partner, and those facets of your relationship will create the foundation necessary to lift each other up for eternity. Those facets of your relationship will ignite the trust and love necessary to have a healthy physical relationship with someone.
I tend to think that it is wrong to attempt being physical with someone in order to prove your emotional and spiritual relationship. Being physical proves nothing. Just like sneezing doesn't indicate having a cold. It could be allergies. You're probably thinking that's an odd analogy by now, but oh well. It's working for me.
Anyway... I've probably beaten the horse dead by now. I just wanted to hit on the importance of the fact that we should all place our emotional and spiritual relationships with people first. Without them, we won't have the foundation necessary for anything else.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Chocolate
I love chocolate. Chocolate donuts, chocolate ice cream, chocolate truffles, chocolate chips, chocolate milk, chocolate cake, brownies, fudge, cookies, candy... Chocolate. Creamy chocolate. Savory chocolate. Rich chocolate. Smooth chocolate. Gooey chocolate. It melts in your mouth, and it warms up your soul.
People always say you can't take your material possessions with you to heaven... and I'm alright with losing the money or the tv or the car, or whatever else you can think of... but I'm pretty sure there's a reason why we have taste buds. Heavenly father gave them to us for a reason. Why eat food, and not taste things? And why taste things, if not to appreciate them? Well, I'm here to say... that I appreciate chocolate. Heavenly Father gave us the blessing of having taste buds, and I intend to make them my closest buddies, and appreciate tasting good things. And among all the things I love.. like butter, peaches, cream, brisket, french fries, cheesy broccoli, scalloped potatoes, chowder, gravy, honey, shrimp, et cetera.... I fully intend on appreciating them. And chocolate.
People always say you can't take your material possessions with you to heaven... and I'm alright with losing the money or the tv or the car, or whatever else you can think of... but I'm pretty sure there's a reason why we have taste buds. Heavenly father gave them to us for a reason. Why eat food, and not taste things? And why taste things, if not to appreciate them? Well, I'm here to say... that I appreciate chocolate. Heavenly Father gave us the blessing of having taste buds, and I intend to make them my closest buddies, and appreciate tasting good things. And among all the things I love.. like butter, peaches, cream, brisket, french fries, cheesy broccoli, scalloped potatoes, chowder, gravy, honey, shrimp, et cetera.... I fully intend on appreciating them. And chocolate.
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Baby News
Well, I don't think I've posted about the baby yet, so I suppose I should! On Tuesday I'll be 28 weeks pregnant (7 months). That means I have only 12 weeks left until my due date... depending on which due date you're using since every time I go to the doctor they switch back and forth between the 25th and the 27th, and the ultra sound people have told me that the 28th of May is actually more accurate. Personally, I'm siding with the 28th since I like that number more, and hey, why not go along with the people actually looking at the baby, and not just taking a stab at when I conceived?
So, on May 28th (in theory of course) I'm supposed to be due for a baby boy. It's a bit of an odd concept really. My body is certainly bigger. I'm certainly not as flexible as I once was. And I do see my tummy tumbling like there's something inside rolling around in there. Fortunately for me, when he gets super excited about kicking, he seems to prefer the right side of my stomach, so I don't get kicked in the ribs very often, which is nice.
But it's still my body, ya know? I have a hard time conceiving of the idea that a little baby will come out and have expectations that I will hold it somewhere other than inside the womb! Something that is currently part of me but one day won't be? I mean let's just be honest here--that's weird! It's not like I look down at my hand and think to myself "One day, you won't be apart of me, but someone else," right!? Well, it's almost the same thing looking down at your stomach and thinking "One day the reason why you're huge, will be a separate being from myself." Yep. That's weird. Some days it feels like my stomach will just always look this way, and it will never change. It was just some new progression in life, like going through puberty. But that's weird because then you have to wonder... well... why would I just plain be huge forever? That's silly, and it would be oh so lame.
People always ask how I'm doing, and I guess I'm doing fine. I try to drink lots of liquids, remember my prenatals, and occasionally eat something besides chocolate. Hah, just kidding =p haha.
And I guess the other question people always ask is "Are you excited?" Which I think is kind of a weird question. Kind of like when you get married and people ask, "How's married life?" and even if marriage life sucked, you'd have no choice but to respond "Oh it's good," because otherwise it'd be awkward, right? I think it's more of a secret test to see if you'll mess up and talk about your marital issues with someone other than your husband, since everyone knows you're not supposed to do that. What a weird society we live in. Anyway, to answer the question "Are you excited?" I guess my response is, that for once in my life, I seem to be enjoying the present moment. I'm content with feeling the kicks, and watching my stomach grow, and if I'm content with meeting the kid when it's time to cross that bridge, then life will be good. That's not to say that on occasion I don't look over at our crib or the car seat or the stroller and imagine some cute little scene playing out in the future... but that's beside the point. And let's be honest, who doesn't want to see Michael hold a baby? Tender.
Right now what I'm most excited for is moving into our new apartment. I've kind of been feeling lately like I need a fresh start, and moving in and rearranging furniture and finding a place for everything always makes you feel like your life is in the right place when you're done. When you finish, you feel like not only is your house in order, but your life is too. My manager at work has asked me several times during the course of my pregnancy if I have started "nesting" yet. Apparently lots of women get obsessed with cleaning shortly before the baby comes? Anyway, I think moving into the new apartment will fulfill my nesting responsibilities and will just plain help me feel fresh and ready for something new. I've told Michael that we'll need to buy a dresser because the closets in the two bedroom apartments here are ridiculously small. They barely hold my clothes, let alone allowing for Michael and I to share a closet. I'm not sure how people manage. And there's nothing like real furniture to make you feel grown up and ready for kids.
Lately I've just been trying to focus on the logistics. I'm definitely beginning to feel the need for maternity clothes. One of my friends recently gave birth, and managed to wear her normal clothes her entire pregnancy. So I was crossing my fingers I could be just like her. But I'm not sure that wish is going to come true. The other big thing on my mind is how much time I'm going to take off work. Of course it's complicated by the fact that Michael is looking for internships, and whatever kind of work schedule he ends up having will effect the kind of work schedule I can have. Part of me has a hard time imagining taking a lot of time off work and spending so much time at home... but part of me realizes that I might want to just stay home lol. I'm also having to look at adjusting my school schedule because I can't just stop working permanently right now... and I can't do work, and be a full time student, and be a full time mom. I don't think the three combined are even possible. So... yep, the planning of the future is a complicated process at the moment. But we did get our insurance all sorted out. I know how much we'll end up spending on delivery of the baby, and I'm supposed to get my Medicaid insurance card sometime this week. So at least some things are figured out.
Anyway, that should be enough details to satisfy any curiosity you might have had about my pregnancy experience, haha. Hope you're all having a wonderful life!
So, on May 28th (in theory of course) I'm supposed to be due for a baby boy. It's a bit of an odd concept really. My body is certainly bigger. I'm certainly not as flexible as I once was. And I do see my tummy tumbling like there's something inside rolling around in there. Fortunately for me, when he gets super excited about kicking, he seems to prefer the right side of my stomach, so I don't get kicked in the ribs very often, which is nice.
But it's still my body, ya know? I have a hard time conceiving of the idea that a little baby will come out and have expectations that I will hold it somewhere other than inside the womb! Something that is currently part of me but one day won't be? I mean let's just be honest here--that's weird! It's not like I look down at my hand and think to myself "One day, you won't be apart of me, but someone else," right!? Well, it's almost the same thing looking down at your stomach and thinking "One day the reason why you're huge, will be a separate being from myself." Yep. That's weird. Some days it feels like my stomach will just always look this way, and it will never change. It was just some new progression in life, like going through puberty. But that's weird because then you have to wonder... well... why would I just plain be huge forever? That's silly, and it would be oh so lame.
People always ask how I'm doing, and I guess I'm doing fine. I try to drink lots of liquids, remember my prenatals, and occasionally eat something besides chocolate. Hah, just kidding =p haha.
And I guess the other question people always ask is "Are you excited?" Which I think is kind of a weird question. Kind of like when you get married and people ask, "How's married life?" and even if marriage life sucked, you'd have no choice but to respond "Oh it's good," because otherwise it'd be awkward, right? I think it's more of a secret test to see if you'll mess up and talk about your marital issues with someone other than your husband, since everyone knows you're not supposed to do that. What a weird society we live in. Anyway, to answer the question "Are you excited?" I guess my response is, that for once in my life, I seem to be enjoying the present moment. I'm content with feeling the kicks, and watching my stomach grow, and if I'm content with meeting the kid when it's time to cross that bridge, then life will be good. That's not to say that on occasion I don't look over at our crib or the car seat or the stroller and imagine some cute little scene playing out in the future... but that's beside the point. And let's be honest, who doesn't want to see Michael hold a baby? Tender.
Right now what I'm most excited for is moving into our new apartment. I've kind of been feeling lately like I need a fresh start, and moving in and rearranging furniture and finding a place for everything always makes you feel like your life is in the right place when you're done. When you finish, you feel like not only is your house in order, but your life is too. My manager at work has asked me several times during the course of my pregnancy if I have started "nesting" yet. Apparently lots of women get obsessed with cleaning shortly before the baby comes? Anyway, I think moving into the new apartment will fulfill my nesting responsibilities and will just plain help me feel fresh and ready for something new. I've told Michael that we'll need to buy a dresser because the closets in the two bedroom apartments here are ridiculously small. They barely hold my clothes, let alone allowing for Michael and I to share a closet. I'm not sure how people manage. And there's nothing like real furniture to make you feel grown up and ready for kids.
Lately I've just been trying to focus on the logistics. I'm definitely beginning to feel the need for maternity clothes. One of my friends recently gave birth, and managed to wear her normal clothes her entire pregnancy. So I was crossing my fingers I could be just like her. But I'm not sure that wish is going to come true. The other big thing on my mind is how much time I'm going to take off work. Of course it's complicated by the fact that Michael is looking for internships, and whatever kind of work schedule he ends up having will effect the kind of work schedule I can have. Part of me has a hard time imagining taking a lot of time off work and spending so much time at home... but part of me realizes that I might want to just stay home lol. I'm also having to look at adjusting my school schedule because I can't just stop working permanently right now... and I can't do work, and be a full time student, and be a full time mom. I don't think the three combined are even possible. So... yep, the planning of the future is a complicated process at the moment. But we did get our insurance all sorted out. I know how much we'll end up spending on delivery of the baby, and I'm supposed to get my Medicaid insurance card sometime this week. So at least some things are figured out.
Anyway, that should be enough details to satisfy any curiosity you might have had about my pregnancy experience, haha. Hope you're all having a wonderful life!
Monday, January 14, 2013
Monday, December 31, 2012
Loving Yourself
Now, this is a subject I've probably touched on before... but I think it's at least been a year or two so it's okay if I touch on it again. Besides, I think it's an important thing to talk about.
We talk a lot about loving others. We talk a lot about putting others before yourself. We talk a lot about being charitable and grateful. However, I think that a lot of those qualities are dependent on another quality. I pose the following question:
"How can you love someone else, if you do not first learn how to love yourself?"
No, I'm not talking about having everyone learn how to be vain. However, I think that someone who does not love themselves cannot be mentally healthy enough to fully love those around them. This might be a difficult concept for me to describe... hm hmm...
Well, when I was in middle school I became extremely self conscious about how I looked. I entered that phase where I thought everyone was judging me all the time (and everyone was going to notice that zit on my face. I'm sure you recall the feeling). It certainly didn't do wonders for my self esteem which was already in a pretty broken state at the time. I realized however, that the people I thought were the most beautiful and magnetic were those that held their head high. You could feel the self confidence emanating from them and it made them prettier than they otherwise might have been.
This might seem silly but I decided that I wanted to have that quality. So I made a goal to look myself in the mirror every day and say "You are beautiful. I am beautiful." I certainly didn't believe it, so don't think it was some act of vanity (hah). I certainly felt a little silly talking to myself in the mirror. But by saying it every day for a while, it taught me several lessons. For one thing, it boosted my spirit and self confidence. Hearing the words, and forcing myself to describe myself in that way improved my own self image. And because I had a better image about myself I was able to view the world in a different way. I didn't have to worry what others thought about me anymore, because I didn't care. I loved myself each day, so I didn't need to feel accepted by anybody else but me. It allowed me to listen to others, without worrying what they were thinking about me.
Not a perfect analogy to what I'm trying to say about loving yourself, but I think it's a step in the right direction to depicting the principle. I guess to summarize... I don't think you can fully love others before you're able to love yourself. It's kind of like that line in the scriptures that says (and I paraphrase), if you then being imperfect are able to give good gifts, imagine the gifts your Father in Heaven can give. Attempting to show others love without first understanding how to love and forgive ourselves is putting a limitation on the love we will be able to demonstrate for others. And why would we ever want to limit the amount of love we can give to others?
I don't feel like I've fully illustrated the principle I'm trying to depict... I feel like it makes more sense when I say it out loud. But I hope some of you are able to feel some of the importance I feel about this subject. I don't think we can reach our own potential as Children of God before we are able to love ourselves. One of the qualities listed in the Doctrine and Covenants of those that reach the Celestial Kingdom of Heaven is that they are able to see as God sees. I think that part of learning to love yourself is learning to see yourself as God sees you. Imagine what a blessing that would be!? And if we could see ourselves in that light, when we seem to judge ourselves more harshly than we would anyone else... imagine how we would then be able to treat others, viewing them as God sees them also! So you see, I don't mean for us to love ourselves in a selfish way... but in a way that would provide us with the skills we need to improve our interactions with the people in our lives.
If there was ever a universal goal we all should make... I think it should be to add loving ourselves to our list of talents.
We talk a lot about loving others. We talk a lot about putting others before yourself. We talk a lot about being charitable and grateful. However, I think that a lot of those qualities are dependent on another quality. I pose the following question:
"How can you love someone else, if you do not first learn how to love yourself?"
No, I'm not talking about having everyone learn how to be vain. However, I think that someone who does not love themselves cannot be mentally healthy enough to fully love those around them. This might be a difficult concept for me to describe... hm hmm...
Well, when I was in middle school I became extremely self conscious about how I looked. I entered that phase where I thought everyone was judging me all the time (and everyone was going to notice that zit on my face. I'm sure you recall the feeling). It certainly didn't do wonders for my self esteem which was already in a pretty broken state at the time. I realized however, that the people I thought were the most beautiful and magnetic were those that held their head high. You could feel the self confidence emanating from them and it made them prettier than they otherwise might have been.
This might seem silly but I decided that I wanted to have that quality. So I made a goal to look myself in the mirror every day and say "You are beautiful. I am beautiful." I certainly didn't believe it, so don't think it was some act of vanity (hah). I certainly felt a little silly talking to myself in the mirror. But by saying it every day for a while, it taught me several lessons. For one thing, it boosted my spirit and self confidence. Hearing the words, and forcing myself to describe myself in that way improved my own self image. And because I had a better image about myself I was able to view the world in a different way. I didn't have to worry what others thought about me anymore, because I didn't care. I loved myself each day, so I didn't need to feel accepted by anybody else but me. It allowed me to listen to others, without worrying what they were thinking about me.
Not a perfect analogy to what I'm trying to say about loving yourself, but I think it's a step in the right direction to depicting the principle. I guess to summarize... I don't think you can fully love others before you're able to love yourself. It's kind of like that line in the scriptures that says (and I paraphrase), if you then being imperfect are able to give good gifts, imagine the gifts your Father in Heaven can give. Attempting to show others love without first understanding how to love and forgive ourselves is putting a limitation on the love we will be able to demonstrate for others. And why would we ever want to limit the amount of love we can give to others?
I don't feel like I've fully illustrated the principle I'm trying to depict... I feel like it makes more sense when I say it out loud. But I hope some of you are able to feel some of the importance I feel about this subject. I don't think we can reach our own potential as Children of God before we are able to love ourselves. One of the qualities listed in the Doctrine and Covenants of those that reach the Celestial Kingdom of Heaven is that they are able to see as God sees. I think that part of learning to love yourself is learning to see yourself as God sees you. Imagine what a blessing that would be!? And if we could see ourselves in that light, when we seem to judge ourselves more harshly than we would anyone else... imagine how we would then be able to treat others, viewing them as God sees them also! So you see, I don't mean for us to love ourselves in a selfish way... but in a way that would provide us with the skills we need to improve our interactions with the people in our lives.
If there was ever a universal goal we all should make... I think it should be to add loving ourselves to our list of talents.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
My Idea of Christmas
Christmas to me is not complete without a few things.
Every Christmas needs a Christmas tree with lights and presents. Even if those presents are fake decorative presents... you just need something pretty underneath the tree. When I think of Christmas I think of little kids anxiously waiting for that long awaited morning. Christmas never seems as magical without a gaggle of kids standing at the top of the stairwell at 5am, waiting to wake up all the adults in the house so the presents can be opened. Christmas is best when I'm sitting next to my mommy kissing her cheek.
No matter how old you are I think you should always get a toy for Christmas. No matter how much you want that outfit, or picture frame or other adult-ly objects... everyone needs a toy to play with on Christmas day. And of course, Christmas can't be complete without hot apple cider and hot cocoa (although not to be enjoyed at the same time, obviously). I look forward to waking up on Christmas morning and eating my hot oatmeal for breakfast. Because when I was a kid my mom's rule was that you had to endure oatmeal for breakfast, and then you could eat whatever you wanted the rest of the day long. It taught us that good things were worth sacrificing for, since we all hated oatmeal. Haha. It's why I don't understand the concept of "Christmas Dinner" because after our oatmeal we didn't eat anything but chocolate and other assorted goodies all day long (brownies and fudge and divinity... Christmas can't be complete without divinity)!
Neither is Christmas complete without chocolate cordial cherries. Because it's one of the few candies my father really likes. So we always had a box of them on Christmas. Growing up in my house, you knew Christmas time hadn't started until the red boxes had arrived in the mail, because my uncle always sent boxes of candies and nuts and cheeses and things for Christmas. They went straight into the fridge, not to be opened until Christmas morning.
Let's see... every year we found an orange and a dime in the bottom of our stockings. It's based on some tradition because old people back down our family line had the same tradition. But apparently it was more exciting back then because oranges were a delicacy or something and dimes were worth a lot more back then haha. I never liked oranges, so mine usually sat at the bottom of my stocking, sometimes found the next year all nasty and green. But I'm going to start a new tradition with my family. CHOCOLATE oranges at the bottom of your stocking, and maybe even a quarter (we have to account for inflation, you know). Much better than real oranges. Chocolate oranges are the best.
On Christmas Eve we always got to open one present. But you always knew what that present was going to be. Every year we got new pajamas. When we were little sometimes mom made them by hand and made them match in cute little ways. One year we all looked like little elves. But usually they were just new pajamas so we'd look cute on Christmas morning. I like that tradition a lot. New pajamas are the best.
Yep, there's a little picture of what Christmas is like for me.
Every Christmas needs a Christmas tree with lights and presents. Even if those presents are fake decorative presents... you just need something pretty underneath the tree. When I think of Christmas I think of little kids anxiously waiting for that long awaited morning. Christmas never seems as magical without a gaggle of kids standing at the top of the stairwell at 5am, waiting to wake up all the adults in the house so the presents can be opened. Christmas is best when I'm sitting next to my mommy kissing her cheek.
No matter how old you are I think you should always get a toy for Christmas. No matter how much you want that outfit, or picture frame or other adult-ly objects... everyone needs a toy to play with on Christmas day. And of course, Christmas can't be complete without hot apple cider and hot cocoa (although not to be enjoyed at the same time, obviously). I look forward to waking up on Christmas morning and eating my hot oatmeal for breakfast. Because when I was a kid my mom's rule was that you had to endure oatmeal for breakfast, and then you could eat whatever you wanted the rest of the day long. It taught us that good things were worth sacrificing for, since we all hated oatmeal. Haha. It's why I don't understand the concept of "Christmas Dinner" because after our oatmeal we didn't eat anything but chocolate and other assorted goodies all day long (brownies and fudge and divinity... Christmas can't be complete without divinity)!
Neither is Christmas complete without chocolate cordial cherries. Because it's one of the few candies my father really likes. So we always had a box of them on Christmas. Growing up in my house, you knew Christmas time hadn't started until the red boxes had arrived in the mail, because my uncle always sent boxes of candies and nuts and cheeses and things for Christmas. They went straight into the fridge, not to be opened until Christmas morning.
Let's see... every year we found an orange and a dime in the bottom of our stockings. It's based on some tradition because old people back down our family line had the same tradition. But apparently it was more exciting back then because oranges were a delicacy or something and dimes were worth a lot more back then haha. I never liked oranges, so mine usually sat at the bottom of my stocking, sometimes found the next year all nasty and green. But I'm going to start a new tradition with my family. CHOCOLATE oranges at the bottom of your stocking, and maybe even a quarter (we have to account for inflation, you know). Much better than real oranges. Chocolate oranges are the best.
On Christmas Eve we always got to open one present. But you always knew what that present was going to be. Every year we got new pajamas. When we were little sometimes mom made them by hand and made them match in cute little ways. One year we all looked like little elves. But usually they were just new pajamas so we'd look cute on Christmas morning. I like that tradition a lot. New pajamas are the best.
Yep, there's a little picture of what Christmas is like for me.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Of Sunshine and Daffodils
This evening I am in a cheery mood. Usually my cheery moods are reserved for day time, so it's a peculiar evening I suppose! I guess I have a lot on my mind, and so I don't feel like going to bed, which would of course, be ever so boring.
I feel like I have so very much to be grateful for right now. For one, the semester is over and I'm finally beginning to feel free from its grasp. What could be better than that, right? Except I also get to look forward to going HOME to TEXAS and seeing my FAMILY! And those who know me, know that what that really means is taking lots of pictures... especially with my mommy and my nephews and nieces, since they're my favorite. Not much makes me happier in this world than taking [good] pictures with people that I love doing fun, happy, sun-shiney things. And if I'm lucky the sun will still exist in Texas this time of year, unlike in Rexburg!
On top of both of those wonderful things, I have a friend. It's been a really long time since I've had a friend in Rexburg that I could play with. And now, I have a friend. And she is wonderful to me, and we have long conversations and we hug, and we smile and we laugh and we cry and it's great. She is a wonderful reminder to me that God loves me individually, which is of course, another thing in my life that I am eternally grateful for... The Lord and his ever redeeming love.
Plus.... (I know, so many things, right!?) in less than a month I find out if I'm having a girl or a boy. I think that will be the point when I feel ready to start spending money on baby things. It'll feel much more real to me when I can attach a gender to the invisible, supposed "it" in my belly.
Life is on the ups.
I'm looking forward to many things, but I'm able to enjoy today as well... which is by far one of the greatest blessings we can have in life, in my opinion.
I feel like I have so very much to be grateful for right now. For one, the semester is over and I'm finally beginning to feel free from its grasp. What could be better than that, right? Except I also get to look forward to going HOME to TEXAS and seeing my FAMILY! And those who know me, know that what that really means is taking lots of pictures... especially with my mommy and my nephews and nieces, since they're my favorite. Not much makes me happier in this world than taking [good] pictures with people that I love doing fun, happy, sun-shiney things. And if I'm lucky the sun will still exist in Texas this time of year, unlike in Rexburg!
On top of both of those wonderful things, I have a friend. It's been a really long time since I've had a friend in Rexburg that I could play with. And now, I have a friend. And she is wonderful to me, and we have long conversations and we hug, and we smile and we laugh and we cry and it's great. She is a wonderful reminder to me that God loves me individually, which is of course, another thing in my life that I am eternally grateful for... The Lord and his ever redeeming love.
Plus.... (I know, so many things, right!?) in less than a month I find out if I'm having a girl or a boy. I think that will be the point when I feel ready to start spending money on baby things. It'll feel much more real to me when I can attach a gender to the invisible, supposed "it" in my belly.
Life is on the ups.
I'm looking forward to many things, but I'm able to enjoy today as well... which is by far one of the greatest blessings we can have in life, in my opinion.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Heaven-like
On Wednesday we had our very last class of Doctrine & Covenants. The reading assignment for that day was D&C 76... which is an incredibly long section, let me just tell you. Anyway, my teacher was explaining that a lot of people out there think that we believe only Mormons get into heaven, and that we're pretty exclusive in our beliefs to think that way. However, my teacher made the point that our view of heaven allows alot more people into heaven than the traditional view.
We believe in three separate kingdoms of heaven.
The telestial -those that receive not the gospel of Christ, and do not deny the Holy Ghost
The terrestrial -those that receive not the gospel of Christ, but are honorable men
The celestial -just men made perfect through Christ
We believe that all children who die before the age of 8 make it into the highest (the Celestial) level of heaven. And those that died without the gospel but would have accepted it had they received it, and those that are baptized and go through one of the Lord's holy temples will achieve that Celestial glory. Which is where people get the idea that we think only Mormons get into heaven. But Joseph Smith said that if we could glimpse even the lowest degree of heaven (the telestial), we would kill ourselves just to get there. God loves his children and he wants us all to be happy. He loves us so much that he is willing to design a plan, where we can all attain peace and happiness, even if we don't choose to follow Him. Only those that know and fully understand the truth, and willingly choose to defy the Holy Ghost, and fight against Christ get stuck in "outer darkness", or hell.
Contrast that to the more traditional views of heaven and hell, where people who believe in Christ go to heaven, and people who don't believe in Christ go to hell.
But on another note, there was something else that stood out to me more. Verse 94, of section 76 gives a line describing those that attain the Celestial glory: "they see as they are seen, and know as they are known, having received of his fulness and of his grace"
I believe this emphasizes the importance of viewing others, and ourselves, the way Christ sees us. Christ would have us love others the way he loves them. He would have us love ourselves, and see the potential we have to do good. Imagine all the hurt and despair that would be gone from the world if we would only open our eyes to the beautiful potential of everyone within our grasp--if we did not limit ourselves or others.
People ask, how could God let this happen to me? God believes in agency. We each have the opportunity to choose for ourselves. If you think about it that way... I don't think that many of us would choose to sacrifice our freedom of choice, to be protected from bad things. Don't you think God would prefer that we all loved each other as much as he does? Don't you think he would prefer that none of us chose to hurt others? But like I pointed out, losing our agency is not worth losing all negative experiences. We're on this earth to grow, to experience sadness and joy. Would you really want to get to heaven and look back on your life and see that you never learned what sadness was? How disappointing would that be, to not understand half of the human experience? Let alone the fact, that I don't believe you can experience joy without being able to distinguish it from sadness.
I'm grateful for my experiences, no matter how much of a burden they may seem. They bless my life in ways I will forever be grateful for.
We believe in three separate kingdoms of heaven.
The telestial -those that receive not the gospel of Christ, and do not deny the Holy Ghost
The terrestrial -those that receive not the gospel of Christ, but are honorable men
The celestial -just men made perfect through Christ
We believe that all children who die before the age of 8 make it into the highest (the Celestial) level of heaven. And those that died without the gospel but would have accepted it had they received it, and those that are baptized and go through one of the Lord's holy temples will achieve that Celestial glory. Which is where people get the idea that we think only Mormons get into heaven. But Joseph Smith said that if we could glimpse even the lowest degree of heaven (the telestial), we would kill ourselves just to get there. God loves his children and he wants us all to be happy. He loves us so much that he is willing to design a plan, where we can all attain peace and happiness, even if we don't choose to follow Him. Only those that know and fully understand the truth, and willingly choose to defy the Holy Ghost, and fight against Christ get stuck in "outer darkness", or hell.
Contrast that to the more traditional views of heaven and hell, where people who believe in Christ go to heaven, and people who don't believe in Christ go to hell.
But on another note, there was something else that stood out to me more. Verse 94, of section 76 gives a line describing those that attain the Celestial glory: "they see as they are seen, and know as they are known, having received of his fulness and of his grace"
I believe this emphasizes the importance of viewing others, and ourselves, the way Christ sees us. Christ would have us love others the way he loves them. He would have us love ourselves, and see the potential we have to do good. Imagine all the hurt and despair that would be gone from the world if we would only open our eyes to the beautiful potential of everyone within our grasp--if we did not limit ourselves or others.
People ask, how could God let this happen to me? God believes in agency. We each have the opportunity to choose for ourselves. If you think about it that way... I don't think that many of us would choose to sacrifice our freedom of choice, to be protected from bad things. Don't you think God would prefer that we all loved each other as much as he does? Don't you think he would prefer that none of us chose to hurt others? But like I pointed out, losing our agency is not worth losing all negative experiences. We're on this earth to grow, to experience sadness and joy. Would you really want to get to heaven and look back on your life and see that you never learned what sadness was? How disappointing would that be, to not understand half of the human experience? Let alone the fact, that I don't believe you can experience joy without being able to distinguish it from sadness.
I'm grateful for my experiences, no matter how much of a burden they may seem. They bless my life in ways I will forever be grateful for.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Not Yet Christmas Time
I have to admit that I have been in the mood for Christmas. I'm not super big into Halloween decorations, so my Halloween decorations looked more like Thanksgiving decorations. So now that I feel ready to redecorate, I don't have a lot to do for Thanksgiving! I've tried to keep my eyes and to see if there was anything I could buy to add to my decorations to satisfy my urge, but most of the decorations I've seen are lawn decorations. It seems a little bit early to do Christmas decorations though! Part of me says that they shouldn't go up until Thanksgiving's over, or else Thanksgiving would feel a little weird with a Christmas tree in the background... but on the other hand... Since Michael and I will be going down to Texas the week before Christmas, our time amongst our own decorations will be cut short. So maybe I should put them up early! lol. Oh, what a conundrum!
I'm starting to feel ready for Christmas. It keeps snowing! Let alone the fact that I'm probably excited because Christmas time means the semester is over, I'll be home in Texas, and I'll be with family. So obviously, it's my thing that I'm looking forward to at the moment.
Less than 2 weeks until Thanksgiving. 5 weeks until the semester's over (less if you don't count the testing days). And then just a few days later, I'll be in Texas. And then it'll be Christmas a few days after that! I'll be glad.
I'm starting to feel ready for Christmas. It keeps snowing! Let alone the fact that I'm probably excited because Christmas time means the semester is over, I'll be home in Texas, and I'll be with family. So obviously, it's my thing that I'm looking forward to at the moment.
Less than 2 weeks until Thanksgiving. 5 weeks until the semester's over (less if you don't count the testing days). And then just a few days later, I'll be in Texas. And then it'll be Christmas a few days after that! I'll be glad.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
KONY 2012 ... NOVEMBER 17th
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